Lessons

He never knew me

He was a lesson learned

One rose given in love

Sweeter than the dozens he bought to cover his guilt

          My favorites are lilies

Love Is

Love is never hard to find

It comes easy or not at all

Watching, waiting

For his reply

As he waits for me to fall

          Fall I did

So far down

Hollow was my decline

Descending the void

Transcending myself

          Letting go

I ran

As I often do, as I know how

Here I am safe

          Warren found

                   Dreams alive

I live

Now

          Here

                   Love is

Husband

Pale shadows, illusions of love

Shattered by morning’s light

Mere memories of softness

Disappeared with the night

Sunlight loves to burn it down

Silver on the pillow falls

She can’t stand to face the day

Rolls back over, looks at walls

Too strong to cry, to proud to beg

Too hurt ever to go back

That ice so thick, painfully deep

Fades the heart to bitter black

He never knew

The foolish man

Never knew the hurt he caused

And rabbit ran

He never knew

          …Two foolish men

Empty

Frost covers my soul and I can no longer find my emotions

Tears have ceased to fall.

I face the storms alone, gripping my own shoulders looking for solace,

loving only the grey that surrounds my heart.

Emotion is just a word that holds no meaning.

Love?

Behind the Glass Again

She walks in the space between dreams and waking light

Shadows are her home

Wandering in the fall of everything

Dancing across the memories

Some soft, some hard, some broken

Fragments of what we were

She is a ghost beneath the water's surface

The lost soul behind the glass

Untouchable, reclusive

Left inside herself again

Grey and somber

The Lady walks her path alone

In silence

The House that I Built

Nacreous colors dance through the surface

Of a tattered mind

Devoured by shadows

As the storm closes in

I live in a house that I myself built

Made of jaded beams forged in lost faith

The walls here are anger and hatred and guilt

All around pieces falling like ashes from a fire

Blackness with the iridescent shine of dreams

Fills her heart with frost, upon its walls dancing

Beyond feeling or sleep

Inside and alone, this destructive seclusion

Bearable

Shame

Unbearable pain

Reclusive, she hides away

These are the nails that bind me to my cross

This is the house

That I myself built

Better Forgotten

Dreaming of yesterdays better forgotten

She lifts her face up to taste rain from the skies

Carries those dreams on a train bound for nowhere

The Lady with cold, haunted eyes

Sometimes death is still there waiting

Long nights she's afraid to sleep

Someday, she knows, her past will catch her

For all that we sow we will reap

Novocain runs through her veins and she's sullen

Drifting to places she's left far behind

Somehow she's never quite lost all the shadows

Those places that haunt the dark space in her mind

Sometimes death is still there waiting

Long nights she's afraid to sleep

Someday, she knows, her past will catch her

For all that we sow we will reap

Mother and lover and daughter and best friend

Artist and poet and athlete now gone

Once such a Lady and once such a Demon

Never quite knowing which one

Sometimes death is still there waiting

Long nights she's afraid to sleep

Someday, she knows, her past will catch her

For all that we sow we will reap